February 22, 2012

All I can say is WOW.

Clearly, even as I type these words I am being bombarded with things to come against me and attempt to put a damper on the moment. But I refuse to let the enemy steal my joy, and certainly not my hope.

God's on a reclaiming streak with me right now. I feel Him taking back each area of my life that I allowed to slip away. Its awful to admit, but I have been in such a terrible rut. And from that rut, based originally on many negative circumstances, came an even deeper "pit" that I seemed to fall into.

 “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18 NIV

I've been pondering this verse lately. I still am. I think it may be related to a lot of what I was dealing with. Fear of hurt. Fear of giving in to my grief only to see it swallow me whole. Fear of the "what ifs"...fear of being alone, fear of failure, fear of imperfection, blah blah blah....Wondering about the "Perfect love drives out {or casts out} fear" part. I know God is love, and if He is, and I have allowed Him to reign in my life, then how is there room for fear? Ouch. Guess that means that I've let fear displace an area I should be fully surrendering. Man I hate it when that happens.

 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12:8-10 

Just resolved this recently. For the 80 millionth time. But back to the rut...

Lots of prayer. And I do mean LOTS. Still nothing. And more nothing...followed by guessed it, more NOTHING. I know He hears me. I know He never once left. But are you familiar with silence? Ouch. Seemed like everywhere I turned, I just couldn't get a grip. I'm being vague, and for good reason. Sometimes its easier to relate to each other this way....perhaps you've been there too? Rough spot? Circumstances got you down? Girlfriend, I get it. But through all these trials I've been fighting, I never forgot where to turn. I have to tell you, sometimes I didn't say the right things, or do the right things. There have been days when I felt like I couldn't offer enough to my husband or my family, and certainly not to my creator. On those days, and even on the days when I feel a little better about my "offerings", His grace is enough. It has carried me these past several months years. So of course, what I'm about to tell you...totally has the enemy turning his wheels, waiting to ruin it. But I can't keep this to myself.

Despite the awful week I've had so far with a very sick child (not sure if its strep...some other virus..who knows?) and random other things going wrong, I have had a peace wash over me. The past two weeks I have found encouragement that I feel like was totally orchestrated by God. Every area of my life, and in different places throughout my week,  He's found a way to drop me a little "love note". He's still in charge, and He's got this. * More details about the little love notes to follow in another post...

Why did I doubt? 

I'm so thankful that God knows to send just the right encouragement along....He's never too late.

One more thing....

I've read a few good books lately, and I don't think I have mentioned them since I've not been writing. The first one is called Grace for the Good Girl, by Emily P. Freeman. You can visit her blog here to read more frequently, but today she even pointed you to a great deal at Lifeway to purchase her book on the cheap!
The other book is called One Thousand Gifts, by Ann Voskamp. She has a blog as well, A Holy Experience, which you can find in my blog list on the sidebar. One thing I've noticed in blogland is that many of the blogs I follow have started listing a few of their thankful things at the end of each post. I think I will join that movement, as gratitude just seems to overflow into every crack and crevice. Good stuff.

It feels so good to be back.


Thankful for:
1. Evidence of God's hand in new friendships
2. Anticipating my upcoming trip
3. More orders for my Burlap business
4. Clear answers to prayer in determining which pediatrician to switch to


  1. Oh, the rut. So many of us can relate, even without knowing the details. I love how you say that God is never too late. So true - hard to believe sometimes, but so true.

    Thanks so much for the mention here, Ashley. What a gift!

  2. oh dear, wasn't signed in that time. Let me try again... :)

    1. That's ok...I was still editing my post when I commented on yours. I guess I don't have my act together tonight. :)


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