It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out obvious reasons why I might not slow down to journal my thoughts with three busy girls, but honestly I think its beyond the obvious and expected. I feel like many of my thoughts are best shared through transparent writings. I know that my story has a purpose-one that has and will continue to glorify God. It needs to be shared. So it only stands to reason that the enemy will toss any hindrance my way to stop me.
Now, I'm not one to blame the devil for every crummy moment...each time I stub my toe I don't feel personally attacked. But I'm aware of spiritual warfare and with or without reading The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis one can still use a small amount of biblical knowledge and logic to determine why Satan would want to stop anything God calls us to.
With all that said, I'm making an effort to find balance between my top priorities as a wife and mother to also honor my vow to share my story.
For now, a partial update:
This past year I believe I've lost my mind. At least where my plan-it-all nature is concerned. I dove completely into something I said I'd never...homeschooling. God called...I answered and no matter how much I
Its been a crazy year. Terrifying at times. Financially, emotionally, relationally....I've felt drained. So many things have transpired that I never would've imagined we'd see. But God has proven Himself faithful again and again.
The most recent events of our life are sort of delicate and not appropriate to be shared in great detail but I will just sum it up. We've had the hardest year financially that we've ever had. We've made less money for the year than in many recent years. But we've managed to pay off more debt in the last 2.5 years than we were ever disciplined enough to do in our entire marriage. We've managed to budget down to the penny each month using our little Dave Ramsey tools online. And we've grown together leaps and bounds because of these trials. God showed up recently in a crazy way and relieved us of some crazy financial and emotional burdens. Y'all. These were life changing things that we were anticipating. Basically in one giant swoop (within about a month) he has relieved that stress.
We are looking forward to January with hope once again. And "....From everyone who has been given much, much will be required...." (Luke 12:48 partial verse) We've been praying for some time now about a few things we'd love to do if things ever turned around for us financially. Some of them I'd like to keep private for now, but generally speaking it involves blessing others.
The other major discussion has been adoption.
I'm thrilled to finally say we are beginning that journey in the coming weeks. I'm sure more details will be shared along the way, but for now we covet your prayers that God will order our steps and protect both our biological children and our child we have yet to meet. We also appreciate prayers for continued provision as we trust God in this next chapter.
"Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!” Luke 1:45
-Ashley